Nurse Practitioner Guest Author
academic medical center in New York City
Mary Jo Holuba, MSN, RN, CRNP is a pediatric oncology nurse practitioner who she specializes in the care of patients who have undergone hematopoietic stem cell transplants. She currently practices at an academic medical center in New York City.
When the COVID-19 alarms were raised, I got ready for battle against the virus the world was fighting, only to later feel cut off from “the cause” as my efforts to volunteer outside of my daily work were denied time and again. Some might call it luck, but for me, it felt isolating.
A collection of poems entitled “Meditations on Family.”
A collection of poems entitled “Meditations on God.”
At first, my heart pauses: frozen from shock. / But, within a few seconds, I start to take stock.
I recall my father sitting on a small stool in the kitchen / dialing friends and family, one by one, rippling outward
my patient does not have insurance / he asks me to address his concerns
Illness lies hidden in our ways / Influenced by the unconscious gaze.
“One” / It read. / Unassuming in black and white
Scared and frightened, we came in as interns / We had the knowledge, but we needed direction
I seize. / With emotion, not motor.
To help a soul / To heal a wound / To hold a hand / To walk again
Here I am, come and get me! A playful provocation we have all used with much more than literal meaning as a mantra. But going through the rigors, chills and metaphorical bacteremia of medical education, I lost some of the pieces that made me confident to be myself.
Fellow Physician Contributing Writer
Johns Hopkins University / National Institutes of Health
Dr. Michael Barbato is a pediatric hematology oncology fellow at Johns Hopkins University/National Institutes of Health. He is specializing in epigenetic research and considering a bone marrow transplant clinical focus. He is interested in advocating for maintaining professional and personal life balance in medicine and physician burnout. He is particularly passionate about the arts and how they can be used as expressions in medicine. He can be found on Instagram @mibarbato.
